Go ahead.. I dare you

During the everyday rituals of brushing,dressing up or bath time, the multi-tasking Amma gets into a 'Q & A' mode in the best hope of training the little one with some worldly gyan.Few snippets on how these sessions end up in reality..

Me : Baby,tell me the parts of our body

Tanya : Eyes

Me : Good

Tanya : Ears

Me : Good

Tanya : Hands

Me : Good

Tanya : Belly Button (Giggles!)

Me : Hmm,

Tanya : Hair

Me : Good

Tanya : Hairband

Me : Oh my! Okay.Stop.

Me : Baby,Now tell me five vehicles you know

Tanya : Car

Tanya : Bus Bus

Tanya : Cycle Cycle (Giggles)

Me : ----- silence ----

Me : Okay baby.Tell me some wild animals now

Tanya : Tiger

Tanya : Lion

Tanya : Saranya meow.. (the stray cat that visits our home)

Me: Baby,but its not a wild animal

Tanya : But Amma,it doesnot live in our home

Me : Point taken.No arguments with the kids of this generation.

A Bedtime story

Tanya : Amma, I will tell you a story

Me (Relieved!) : Good baby,please go ahead

Tanya : Once upon a time..

Me      : Wow.. Wow..now thats a good start..

Tanya : Once upon a time,there was a Crow

Me      : Ahem..

Tanya : What he do?

Me      : I don't know,you tell me baby

Tanya : (after lot of silence and giggles).. "He frightened a little mouse under the chair".Story over.

Me      : Oh my! Is this the story?

Tanya : Yes Amma.

Me : Acting upset..

Tanya : Okay,Don't worry Amma."Iam not your friend,Iam your Bhessttuu Friend".So I will tell you another story..

Me : Okay baby.Tell me a nice story then..

Tanya : Once upon a time,there was a .. DADA

Tanya : What he do?

Tanya : After some silence..

Tanya : "He frightened a little mouse under the chair"

Me : Oh my ! Giggles with her and the same story continues in a loop

Tanya : Once upon a time,there was an .. ANT

Tanya : What he do?

Tanya : "He frightened a little mouse under the chair"

Me : listens to the same climax for  the 1,00,000000 nth time just to hear her endless giggles at each interval.Patience is a virtue :) :)

Next ROLL...

Been ages since my last post on this space.Making an attempt to summarize the events in the busy mamma's life,calls for some dedicated minutes.While that old-granny-chicken hogged this noon,gets digested in the tummy,here is a quick snippet of how things are progressing so far..

There is a wedding in the family..yayy!! Bro is getting married in two weeks from now.Shopping has been maniacal for a while,as is in every Indian household at wedding times.Trying to halt the shopping spree,before the mighty ATM machines themselves cry out 'Stop withdrawing all my funds'..well,you get my drift rite?

At home,the husband has moved out of state on grounds of his new job,which means the task of entertaining the toddler solely rests on me now or vice a versa.The toddler is quickly growing out of the 'Little Tanu' phase.I no longer have to remember her age by days or months and can go about saying 'She is 2 years old' for another year.(All the math,too much of computation for the brains,I say!) The little one proudly calls herself  'Taani'  and is able to blurt out many sentences which make some real sense.She seems to absorb all the words spoken around her and coins her own version of the said stuff.Even we adults are getting into the habit of using words from her dictionary occasionally.Sample this,

Puppy(Dog) is now 'Pappichi' ,
'Chapathi' is 'Chapa-bathy' (sounds like Sababathy..),
Car is 'Boo-Car',
Bathing is 'Wash-Wash',
Sleeping is 'Cha-chi',
Food is 'Mum-mum',
Chocolate is 'Kishyy',
Tortoise is 'Tatoise',
Shame-Shame is 'Shasham',
and the likes.

Very recently,she has learnt to say 'Yummy' (credits to her pre-school trainers).Now she screams out excitedly ..'Yummy.. yummy' even after drinking water or tasting toothpaste.Talking of which reminds me of  the 'A for Apple' episode.I quickly run her through an alphabet tutorial just before we call it a day.She can manage from 'A for Apple' to 'G for Jimmy' (by the way..Jimmy is the name of her stuffed pet toy Giraffe) .The Pappa used to get irritated and question Lord Almighty,why the mom-daughter duo always choose weird hours at the night to go through alphabet practice.Sometimes he catches a short nap and wakes up only to find us still fighting 'B for what?'.. and Tanu saying 'B for Cat'.She used to happily associate 'I' with 'Icchcream',mind you,its ice-cream(yummy! yummy!) not the itch cream :P but gets quite confused when the order is changed.The other day I found myself teaching her 'I' for 'Eyes'..Oucchh! Blame it on her,for all the confusion.Now these alphabet wars go on peacefully until late in the night,as the Pappa is not even in the close vicinity of his sleep getting disturbed by our midnight-tutorials.Big relief for him this,he gets his sleep ontime.

Well at the office,I dont notice any drastic change inspite of a year long absence,pretty much everything seems to be as crazy as it was back then.Back to a paid working mode,means incorporating some additional tasks like battling with the traffic amidst the daily chores.Back to our lunch gossips and back to everything that was so dearly missed for sometime in a foreign land.Even the cafeteria chai-wallah remembered my preference for Tea at his counter even after a prolonged absence.Did I miss mentioning about the new entry in office?..we now have a coffee machine in the pantry where one has to press 'Tea' to get some 'milk'.

All these make my routine and with a re-appearing sickness every 3-4 days(which is meant to last for few more months) Iam drained to the bone by the end of day.Anything monotonous has no fun.Love being busy,love this multi-tasking,love looking forward to that chilled friday evening approaching with the speed of a tatoise.Happy weekend!

The Nocturnal Visitor

The baby is fast asleep
Smiling in her sleep

The idiot box unplugged to rest
After all, the soaps are one big mess

Elders are at ease and snoring in peace
In (tea) estates there are no thieves

As the house goes silent
The clock ticks very violent

Absence made the heart fonder
But the eyes could remain open no longer

For it was way past midnight

And 2:30am in the night

Just then a noise
Woke me from my trance

As the rustle got stronger
I held my breath longer

Who is there? I ask
But hear no voice..

More crackling follows
And fear grips my throat

Closing the book I read,
Step by step I tread

Powered by the moonlight
A stranger in the night

A quick peep through the curtain
Revealed a giant mountain

Sure there was someone
but no human this one

Two long tusks on my right
Sheer magificience the very sight

The baby might wake up and let out a wail
or the dog might go crazy and wag his tail

The heart skips a beat
To survive a giant tusker,is no mean feat

But he meant no harm
And went off so calm

Quietly out the fence
Without any hindrance

Only if us humans
Could learn from him,some sense

We would mind our business
And avoid all nonsense

...zOMG!

So dear friends, after a long slumber,Iam resurfacing back in India.Residing abroad for almost a year,the blood is now heavily infused with a strong dose of patriotism.Never loved my country better.

Inspite of having quite a few helping hands back home,one still couldnot get back to blogging.Time and again,drafts composed in the head,just got lost in oblivion.Every spare moment one was virtually whipped to rush to matrimonial portals.Yes,those online matrimonial portals.Well,guys wait a minute,not that I had any ideas,am still happily married.Was doing my duty diligently as an elder sister to the little brother,sigh! he is not that little anymore.

Browsing through hundreds of bride profiles,it was indeed an ardous task.The marriage market is quite complex..with the volume of choices and demands,one is bound to get lost.Now,the parents are real happy that I never put them through this misery.Though,I can never deny the process(hunt) was sure entertaining,atleast for me ;) Well,you will know why..read through few of these bride intros from one such matrimony portal.

1) She is simple , lovable, kind and carrying girl  ....wt?

2) i want a simple and cute guy,,,,,and also chilly boy,,i must want non drunker ....a hot hunk eh?

3) I am normal person from good and cultured family  ....no comments

4) My Sister will be so so so so Family caring and Lovely and Sweet girl    ....so ^ 4

5) she is very nice girl.she got a teacher or any degree graduate man     ....God bless you

6) Few words about my daughter:Diploma in computer animation, Certified in tally, Flash, Photoshop, Carol Draw, MS office,3DS Maya max.   ....job application?

7) i'm a stubborn sweetheart.. love to hide emotions.. sometimes loves to pretend to be happy  ....she might as well pretend to be married :)

8) job oriented ,enjoyable,health is wealth.helping nature.struggling for wealth  ....We will keep you in our prayers

9) I want Traditional family, Educational with Working Men....I am looking for my life partner who would be a great companion and friend   .... Men?

10) This profile has been created for my daughter.she has completed B Com with computer application and tax practitioner course and currently doing PSC coaching and hardly working to get a government job...somebody please call the grammar police

Period.

Much Ado About Nothing

All the mad frenzy,extreme precautions,peek-a-boo games and the hype..surrounding Beti B's publicity stunts Tanu finally decided enough is enough.Here are some master plans designed by our little genius to help,a slightly junior Aaradhya Bachchan,stay away from media glare.

Plan 1
Wear an oversized jacket and lift your hand up
exactly when you hear a click

Plan 2
Run and quickly hide behind some blinds,considering you have outgrown files and jackets now.

Plan 3
Just grab the lens.. as simple as that..

Plan 4
Pretend you are busy and walk away hastily















Plan 5
Contort your face in all possible directions,so nobody can dare take a guess

Plan 6
Pretend you have just seen a monster and run for your life

Plan 7
Wear some oversized glasses

Plan 8
Stick your face to the nearest window/door/wall.Ensure no paparazzi is hanging out on the other side

And the last one...Get back to your Mama.

Pop comes a post

So what do I do in facebook everyday? Like this,like that,comment on friend posts,acquaintance posts,read some random gyan shared by some bored soul and ofcourse,earn some money.Sshh,lets just keep that one as a secret.

My life pretty much revolves around Tanya,you know and I got nothing more to share other than giving the world a glimpse of my baby's growth chart.I know quite a few babies,infact younger than Tanya who hold their own facebook accounts.A pat on your back - all you Mamma(s)/Pappa(s) for you have decided to give individuality to your baby at such young an age.Talking of which,reminds me that sometimes I do oscillate between the idea of creating Tanu's own FB profile instead of letting her dominate mine.But then I also fear ..erm,what if she disowns me for doing that eh?
 - What if she has inherited that chromosomal strand from her father,which might make her consider facebook as a major waste of time?
- What if she turns out to be a private person and gets embarrased seeing her baby pictures shared to random acquaintances by you-know-who?
- What if she screams at me someday as a teenager,'Momma,you embarass me,don't let my friends know that you held a facebook account?' and storms outta the house. Like we are embarrased these days for holding orkut account? Yes,yes..I did say ORKUT,something that was in vogue,when dinosaurs roamed the earth.
- What if she bashes the nose of people in a fit of anger,reading those unsolicited provocative comments,no matter how well they were sugar-coated.
- What if facebook gets so outdated when she is grown up and she will not even give a damn about the facebook account I might have painstakingly launched and maintained on her behalf.

...so on and so forth.Better to update one's playlist of nursery rhymes in the slot alloted for facebook liking/sharing,atleast the former will help me put the baby to sleep early,and erm, then I can get back to check facebook.Ah! Blame the addiction ;)